the month of january deserves that title. in all honesty, it seemed to take forever while living it, but looking back i have no idea where it went. weird how that happens. this month had its ups and downs. i started this month in alberta with friends, always a good start. i got a boyfriend. 2 weeks later i no longer had said boyfriend. i learned a lot about myself through that experience. i also learned a lot about God. i had some fun times with the kids at school (see last post). i traveled to edmonton to experience break forth 2008. it was a good weekend overall. it seemed like God wasn't doing as much in my heart as usual, then sunday happened.
i had open heart surgery on sunday. this is the vision that was told to me by a friend. God was sewing up my heart with a needle and thread. he placed my heart back in my body and watched it beat for a little while. he shook his head, thinking no, this is not quite right. he removed my heart from me, removed his own heart, and proceeded to place his own heart in me. with that he smiled and thought it was how it should be, just right. i then asked about walls. you see, i like walls. they protect me. i am good at hiding behind them. apparently they were around my original heart, but when i received God's they were gone. i have some thoughts of what this all means, but i am open to interpretation if anyone has ideas.
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well, open-heart surgery eh? I like it. I have been so busy lately that it feels like I don't even know what it mean to be vulnerable anymore! The closest thing to me in the last few weeks has been either a microscope or a Buret, I can't decide which one but it's pretty much a sad tie! Anyways, I know this will pass and afterwards I will be glad I trudged through this cesspool of knowledge I'm wading in right now! Actually, I brought some of my chemistry homework to a cafe the other night to watch/listen to a friends band play (which they did a very good job at) and then the next band was playing and I asked if they wanted a djembe player and they said sure so I got up and played the djembe for them for their whole set! that was fun! and it was also not school! Peace.
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